I've Got Something To Be Hopeful About

And You Should Too

During the pandemic, I, like many others, experienced my share of existential crises, and they culminated with me sitting in a boiling hot car, looking down at a tattoo I'd just gotten in secret. I hadn't told anyone what I was going to get. I had told my family I needed their help with an art project. I just didn't tell them that the art project was going on my body. As I looked down at the words that were permanently etched on my body, I smiled and sat with their message for a moment. And right now, a week away from an election that will change the shape of countless lives, I'm looking down at them again, their message even more clear.

I believe that we are in for a beautiful night come Election night. That feels silly and naive to say in the wake of 2016, but I must believe it. And beyond whether it happens or not, I've learned this election cycle that believing it will happen is a much better motivator than believing the opposite. In 2020 I believed the opposite, and in 2016, we were all too cocky to believe anything.

In 2016, I was in school in Pennsylvania. The world was different; we were coming out of the Obama years and laughing at the thought that Trump would or even could be elected. Naturally, we had the most brutal awakening. Most people on the left were collectively traumatized by that night and collectively traumatized by what the polls had told us. But we had been complacent, and we learned a valuable lesson.

Then, in 2020, we were motivated in a different way. We were motivated out of fear and despair. I organized so many of my friends to donate, call, text, write letters, etc, and so many of them did. We also had nothing else to do but mobilize, and that made it easy for us to text a few friends or write a few letters. But the air of desperation was still thick in 2020; we argued and begged people to join our cause, and just enough did.

But then, this year, folks have had different engagement levels. I found that my vote squad, which had been so strong in 2020, was not this cycle. I was demoralized by the lack of engagement and figured that my energy could be used better by canvassing, phone banking, Grindr mobilizing, etc. And so far, I've done more in ways that are much more uncomfortable but more tangible than I did in 2020. Have I reached more people? Who knows. But I have forced myself to engage in democracy in a way I was too afraid to before.  

Why was I able to do so? Hope and optimism. In the days following the DNC, I was elated. Suddenly, our political party was infused with so much hope that I didn't believe Trump stood a chance. But I'd believed that before, so I hunkered down and told myself to get to work. Watching those speeches and listening to those soundbites told me that we had something worth fighting FOR. And that is a much better motivator than something worth fighting AGAINST. The speech that resonated with me the most was Barack Obama's. He spent a large portion of his speech reminding the American people that we are not as different as we may seem and that hate and division are intentional tools of the right to get us to demonize each other. But at the end of the day, we're all Americans.

That sentiment and calm allowed me to have that conversation with my Trump-voting friend, which I wrote about here. But then, in September, when she came to see my show and the rosiness of the DNC wore off, I found that I was less able to process our dialogue. It had felt easy before because I believed that Harris would win. When the doubt set in, I wasn't able to keep the dialogue up; the stakes felt too high. I learned through that that I need to feel hopeful to best mobilize myself. So, I started seeking out information that would make me feel hopeful, and I found a few great sources that I want to share with you.

These sources are grounded in science, fact, and political data. They're poll analysts who explain how sites like 538 work and their immense failings. I've withheld sharing these before because, like most, I don't want hope to breed complacency, but with a week left to go, if people haven't gotten involved yet, nothing I say is going to change that.

And you may be saying, "Aidan, you can't just go out and cherrypick the people whose opinions you like." And I would agree. Except that, I'm doing it in order to make myself feel calmer so that I can then go out and do something. I'm way more able to phone bank when the stakes feel lower. Because what we forget is that we are allowed to talk to people. We're allowed to talk to strangers because even though I may be in New York and they may be in Nevada, we are all part of this democracy, and if they don't want to talk, that's fine too. I say, "Thank you for your time," and we part ways, but some people do want to talk, and those people matter the most. In our social media-divided culture now, we must keep reminding ourselves that little, casual connection is so important. These people don't know who I am, and they never will, but we can take a little bit of time to be kind and calm towards each other, and that matters.

That all being said, here are a few reasons why I think we're going to be okay.

• Trump has been rejected in every election since 2016.

  • 2018, 2020, 2022, and 2023 have all had elections where he or his proxy candidates have been soundly rejected.

• He had a clarity in 2016 that he no longer possesses.

  • Make America Great Again, Build The Wall, Drain The Swamp. What does he have now besides racism and fear?

• This is the first election post-Roe being overturned.

• This is the first election since January 6th.

• Pollsters were also traumatized by 2016 and are much more likely to overpredict Trump than underpredict him.

• The early voting numbers and gender gap are hopeful.

• The racist rally he had at MSG has lit a fire for many that can't be ignored or tolerated.

Some of those I got from this article and others from this one, just in case you want more than bullets. They're both great reads. And as my last appeal to you, dear reader. I hope that reading these words and the words of those much more knowledgeable than me will bring you a little peace this week. And if that is the case, I really hope you use that peace to do something. Volunteer with Knock4Democracy with me, or send a final $10 through oath.vote. Or talk to someone about the election in a calm way that brings you together.

This election is about hope and community. And I'm not talking about just those in your close community, not just those in communities that look like yours, but this beautiful, national community of Americans. And on November 6th, I'm going to look down at my arm again, just like I did in February of 2021, and no matter the outcome of the election, I'll know that the words of Harvey Milk were true when he said them and they're true every day when I read them.

You've got to give 'em hope.

February 26, 2021

I’ll talk to you in a week.

All my love, Aidan